Ain’t That Fucking Peachy

horsemen-of-apocalypse.jpg

While eating a peach fried pie for breakfast this morning, I made the mistake of reading the label. In large letters it stated that it was made from real fruit. In small print, it stated that it was artificially flavored. What kind of happy horseshit is this? Is real fucking peaches suddenly not peachy enough for the modern palette. This surely must be one of the signs of the Apocalypse. But which of the four horsemen comes riding in with a damned peach shoved up his ass?

11 Responses to “Ain’t That Fucking Peachy”

  1. Cause real peaches are sprayed with so much bloody horseshit chemical stuff that the taste is gone, surely the peaches and all sorts over there (and here) are so mass produced and genetically modified that flavour is history.

    True, True. – Pure Evyl

  2. I am still at the peach pie for breakfast part….YUM!

    I would prefer some chocalate cake but it wasn’t too bad. – Pure Evyl

  3. Looks like they brought a Giant Peach with them…

    It really does. – Pure Evyl

  4. I think Evan is onto something – likely they are harvesting the peaches before they are ripe, so they have to enhance the flavor with chemicals and shit. But hey hon, if we’re eating prepackaged pies for breffy maybe we shouldn’t expect too much. 😉
    WC

    That’s true, sad but true. Perhaps one day you could serve me breakfast. 😉 – Pure Evyl

  5. It had to be Pestilence. He’s always been such an asshole.

    Could be. I would guess that Famine is out of the running. – Pure Evyl

  6. Evyl, I’d be happy to serve you and your whole family breffy, any time you happen to be in L.A. Just give me a ringy-dingy and I’ll whip up some good eats for you.

    Although I do hear that Jack in the Box has a lovely breffy menu as well. 😉
    WC

  7. no, i’m going with famine on this one. others suffer because he’s so goddamned greedy and keeps the peaches for himself. had no idea where til now though. thanks for enlightening us all!

  8. I missed this one Evyl.
    Peach fried pie? Sounds like one hell of a carbo load for breakfast.
    As far as food products, nothing is as it seems.
    Scary, huh?
    Check out the ingredients in a Hot Pocket sometime.
    Oy…

    ~m

    I recently watched a comedienne on the Comedy Channel do a bit about Hot Pockets that had me rolling. I will have to see if I can find out his name. One of the funniest lines was regarding all the different flavors that they are always putting out. His take on a new flavor was the Hot Pocket Hot Pocket that tasted just like a Hot Pocket. – Pure Evyl

  9. Jim Gaffigan.
    I saw the show too. Actually bought the audio on ITunes.
    Go to Banana Dreams (my youngest daughters blog)
    and check out .
    After you read her blog and a few comments you’ll see the apple doesn’t fall very far from the tree.

    ~m

  10. I tried to hyperlink but I haven’t had coffee yet.
    Look in her video category for Hot Pockets…
    ~m

  11. that would be pestulence. yup, pestulence has a peach up the ass, an artificially flavored peach at that. how do I know?
    pestulence = nasty
    artificial peach = nasty
    there you have it…

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