Find A Local FuckBuddy My Ass


In my quest to find great pics for this little blogsite, I come across a great many sites that advertise to find local fuck-buddies. I am sorry but does anyone actually believe this bullshit. There is a town not to far from here that has a population of about 20 and that is counting the dogs as well as the people. Yet invariably these ads feature dozens of hot large breasted young women. Where in the fuck are they hiding these young sluts looking for sex?

 It’s not just young hot sluts, I have seen midget strippers, chicks with dicks, scarified dominatrixes, and every sick disgusting fetish fiend in the book listed on these ads. These folks would stick out in a small rural community like a sore thumb and I have yet to see a single damned one of them.

So fuck off local fuck-buddy people. Until you prove that there is actually a hot young midget dominatrix with three DD tits looking for anal sex in my area kiss my ass.

21 Responses to “Find A Local FuckBuddy My Ass”

  1. Three boobies. Extra fun! Yes!

    Sometimes two just aren’t enough. – Evyl

  2. I think I saw her in the bar scene from the first Star Wars flick.

    I run across the same ads myself all the time. The one that cracks me up is “So and So” from Coleman Falls. Well, Coleman Falls is literally a hole in the ground about 6 miles north of here, with a population of about 320. And I can guarantee you that there are no women in Coleman Falls that look like these women.

    Yep those fuckbuddy finders are some lying sumbitches. – Evyl

  3. Fuck-buddies are nice to have. They’re convenient.

    And appreciated. – Evyl

  4. What a coincidence, I have a fuck-buddy EXACTLY like that. And she has a twin sister in Texas. Of course I didn’t locate her thru any kinky internet service. Hell no. I found her the old fasioned way.
    She’s a hooker.
    I know, I know, you can’t exactly call a hooker a “fuck-buddy” per se, but being I get a special discount and we watch basketball together it kinda there. I won’t mention why I get a discount.
    Ooooh, do I sense a fuck buddy fuck you haiku on the way?
    Seriously though
    the town I grew up in is so small when I spank the monkey the folks cross town call me up and ask me to hold it down. I tell them I am holding it…
    but I digress. Its a small town and I see these adds, how the fuck they know where I live I haven’t the foggiest, but they tout all the hotties looking for dates and what. Even sho pics on the banners with names and ages. Papa must be keepin the good ones in the attick. Should have turned off the internet though, they are getting out.

    The world is a much better place when watching basketball with hookers. The very thought of it brings tears of joy down my face. – Evyl

  5. queenbitch Says:

    LOL 3 would be quite handy.
    why do they feel the need to make ads for fuck buddies? in my experience they’re usually ex’s that were too good in the sack to let go or else they’re mates that you wanna get freaky with not someone you met via an ad on “”

    You are wise beyond your years. – Evyl

  6. OH MY GOD the three-eyed dog….fuck, did she grow up near a nuclear power plant? Next you’re gonna tell me she has two ass-holes…

    I woman with two arseholes. Huh, that’s a woman that I could really get behind. – Evyl

  7. heheheee Romi.
    That’d be give a new meaning to double penetration.

    Ohh Yeah!!! – Evyl

  8. I think the woman pictured was mentioned in HItchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, under the name of Eccentria Gallumbits.

    I suspect these dubious “Fuck-buddy” ads merely redirect to more conventional pornographic fare, maybe some kind of phonesex or camgirl website, but use the promise of actual sex to get people’s hopes up.

    Yeah, they’re bastards like that. – Evyl

  9. Doktor Holocaust Says:

    sorry, that last one was me. I’d somehow gotten logged out and hadn’t realized

    That’s cool. – Evyl

  10. The broad in the pic looks like she’d be great to dance with . . .

    I am thinking that motorboating would be awesome. – Evyl

  11. Bruce –lmao. I loved her in Total Recall. Though she seemed shorter, and had lighter hair. And a different face and body. And a scar. Though scars can be cool…getting and giving them…Point being, I think the local fuck buddies are as lame as the party lines from the 80’s. All I picture is the Beavis and Butthead episode where they call the 900 number and the fat guy is in the chair watching the game (yes, basketball, Oz) and the fatter woman is surrounded by nine cats, while ironing the guy’s shirt and saying oh baby, yeah baby into the phone. Other point being I’d kill for one of her three tits even if I had to divide it to show a little love to both of my sparsely populated B cups. None of “my” men here need fuck buddies anyway. You guys have too much adorable charm and cynicism to need that shit. Yes I mean YOU!!! Ignore the trash. Go for the lady in the street and a freak in the bedroom. Or a lady who fucks like a freak in the street >;-)

    A lady and a freak? My little heart goes pitter pat. – Evyl

  12. Frigging hell, I’d be hapy with just one of these split into 2!
    Seriously jealous now!

    Now darlin’, there’s no need to be jealous. Much like that great book I am a fan of all breasts great and small. – Evyl

  13. I’ve been directed here by the hot piece of ass pictured above. Screamingly funny shit, dude. You’ve made this frosty bitch smile something wicked, and that’s some accomplishment. Love your work.

    She’s awesome ain’t she. Luv her to death and if your sites as great as your comments, I am sure that it will rule. – Evyl

  14. anonypop Says:

    imagine what they will look like when she’s 80???????
    God I’m a bastard. That’s a image nobody wanted!

    What I am wondering about on that third boob at age 30, is would the third boob get in the way of oral sex or would it just be neat to have something else close at hand to play with? And by the way there isn’t to many images that I don’t want to see. – Evyl

  15. Anonypop Says:

    Age eighty evyl her nipples would be so low you would have to decide which one of four was the clit for oral sex ?

    I love choices. – Evyl

  16. Dudes, Check this shit out!!! The whole 10 commandments of On Line Booty Call is funny as shit.

  17. lookinh 4 weman who want 2 fuck

    With a come on line like that you should be getting lots of attention any day now. Good luck. – Evyl

  18. I think these ads are the same, no matter where you live. The website checks the cookies on your computer, finds out where you live, and then says “Fuck buddies from _______” whatever your town is.

    Amen to how annoying they are though…

    Yep, they are a pain in the ass. – Evyl

  19. 3 tit woman…? A clever piece of photoshop, or simple use MS PhotoEd and Paint.

    Whatever it was it is clever. – Evyl

  20. Being myself a mistress lover I loved every single word of this fantastic post !

  21. I like licking pussy and to be with acouple

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