Fuck You Haiku: Sixty-Seven


Cold Spring Mornings Are Unfair

I don’t like the cold

Perky nipples for hotties

Shriveled pods for men.


15 Responses to “Fuck You Haiku: Sixty-Seven”

  1. Hehehe – very nice haiku! 🙂

    Thanks, darlin’. – Evyl

  2. Doktor Holocaust Says:

    if you wear the right pants, women won’t see your shriveled pods, but you can still enjoy all the pleasant views a cold spring morning has to offer.

    I suppose that is true. – Evyl

  3. scuse me
    i’d like to vote here
    me likum much the perky nipples
    perky nipples makes the Oz a happy man
    the Oz is into cheap thrills
    The Oz has never before refered to himself in the third person before
    The Oz will stop now cause this is really stupid

    I never have understood folks that used third person while talking. I’m sure that it cost Bob Dole an election. That and his fucking eyebrows. WTF was up with that? – Evyl

  4. You poor darlin’s get all shrivelly and that’s BAD but we women can’t even have a conversation with a man ’cause he’s too distracted to look us in the eyes or pay attention to the conversation. 😛

    I’m sorry I didn’t catch what you were saying. I was thinking about your nipples. – Evyl 😉

  5. Ahhhh! I hate perking nipples! And mine are ALWAYS perky.

    Just one more reason for me to love ya. – Evyl

  6. Mmm .. perky nipples.

    You said it. – Evyl

  7. Titanium nipple rings, always perky. 🙂

    Yeah, I know, I’m cheating.

    I am not one to complain how it works. The end justifies the means when perky nipples are involved. – Evyl

  8. damn it Evyl – i’ve asked you to stop posting my boobs!

    Actually, it can be somewhat embarrassing for a woman, especially in a meeting or at a la-de-da event where perky nipples are quite inappopriate. Guys might be able to thump an erection into submission but thumping nipples just makes ’em harder. What’s a girl to do?

    I really have no answer. Perhaps due to the fact that I am of the opinion that perky nipples are always appropriate. – Evyl

  9. Doktor Holocaust Says:

    as it has been explained to me by female friends, eye contact early on can earn points towards prolonged nipple displays later down the line.

    True, and it is a good thing that I have excellent peripheral vision in all directions. – Evyl

  10. QueenBitch Says:

    Thats one of the reasons I love padded bras. They hide the nipple AND they give my tits a lil bit more growth as they seem to have shrunk 😦

    I have never been one to advocate false advertising. But then again, I have never complained when I have been duped in this regard. I’m just a gentleman like that. – Evyl

  11. Yes you are a true gentleman. If only there were more guys like you evyl *sighs*

    Awww, you have me blushing. – Evyl

  12. Why is it that most womens want to HIDE perky nipples? Nipples are fucking sexy, they arent to be hidden ..

    You are preaching to the choir, sister. – Evyl

  13. Socks, Evyl, where are your socks??? Not on your feet are they??? Although stockings can work better, less “obvious” mis-shapen lumpy bits. Although lumpy bits are good, not when they are the wrong shape.

    And nipples, thats what the ice cube tray is for isn’t it ?????? What, the ice cubes are for drinks???? Noooooooooooooooo

    I have never felt the need to stuff for bulge. Although I have felt the need to wear baggie britches to avoid scaring young girls and making old women blush. 😉 And what can one say about the old stripper technique of ice cubes. It does get the job done. – Evyl

  14. Is it wrong that I love showing off my boobies when it’s cold out?

    It isn’t wrong. If loving perky nipples is wrong, I don’t want to be right. – Evyl

  15. romi41 Says:

    I have that shirt in every colour, and I’ve prolly got a few more weeks of cold brisk morning to take advantage of… 🙂

    Pinks my fave. Betcha guessed that one. – Evyl

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