Tuesday’s Twisted Tasteless Poetry: Episode III

Full Gospel

Christian Ken was a full gospel man

Cruised the land in a full gospel van

He traveled far and he traveled near

He preached the full gospel to all that would hear

He preached against demons and the wages of sin

He preached against abortionists and men who fuck men

He preached against Spongebob, Teletubbies, and The Wiggles

Ignoring the laughs, the smirks, and the giggles.

 He preached against evolution and fucking on all fours.

He preached against gambling, drinking, and whores.

He preached against drugs and soft and hard core porn.

He preached at night and he preached in the morn.

He preached and he postured and he prayed

But poor Christian Ken could never get laid.

At the end of his preaching back in his van

His only comfort was the laying on of his hand.

Amen.

8 Responses to “Tuesday’s Twisted Tasteless Poetry: Episode III”

  1. And just a reminder each comment this week could be the winning comment for Freak of The Week.

  2. That’s so fucking hysterical. After the fundie email I received today, you made me smile. I adore you.

    Thanks darlin’. You have a special place in this cold dark heart of mine as well. – Evyl

  3. Because Ken, for all his preachin’, really wanted a big hard dick in his rear end.

    Ahh, the Ken as queer angle. Here’s my line on that subject that didn’t make the original.

    He shoved the bullet too far up his ass.
    And quoted the scripture, ‘This too shall pass.’

    Evyl

  4. That is so Pure F’n evyl!! I am laughing so loud at work that I am having to explain myself.

    Hope it doesn’t get you into trouble. – Evyl

  5. I love how you combine great poetry with humor and sleaze. You really are talented. I will have to try that sometime when I am feeling inspired.

    Ahh, you’re making me blush and I can’t wait to see the fruits of your inspiration. – Evyl

  6. Being introduced to your blog has given me a whole new perspective on life Evyl 😉 Seriously, that’s good rhyme!

    Thanks, darlin’. I appreciate it. – Evyl

  7. The only way this could be any better is if you put it to music and sing for us. Yes, I think a you-tube version should definitely be next on your list.

    Something quite like that is on the horizon. Everyone will hear about it soon. – Evyl

  8. Yes, Christian Ken was a horny little man
    But a righteous one never the less.
    As he came in his sock he shouted out “Heal!”
    But he missed and he made quite a mess!

    Evyl, you inspire me!

    You have the gift. – Evyl

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