Now That’s Fucking Lazy

I recently saw a commercial advertising a text service. All a person had to do was text a question and the service would answer it for 99 cents. I suppose this is a service for assholes that are too fucking lazy to Google for themselves or some fucking Cliff Clavin type of asshole that just has to have the right Jeopardy answer while spouting bullshit at the corner of the bar. Either way an asshole and his money are soon parted.

18 Responses to “Now That’s Fucking Lazy”

  1. Doktor Holocaust Says:

    a buck to pay someone to Google something for you and text you the answer? a chance to part assholes from their money ninety-nine cents at a time? damn, I’m in the wrong line of work. for an extra fifty cents, I’d even throw in an email with information copy-and-pasted from Wikipedia, and for a quarter above that i’d add some complete bullshit that sounds funny and almost true as a cherry on top

    Now that’s a deal. – Evyl

  2. How about a service that charges them 2 dollars to wipe their ass….uh, nevermind

    I think I have two bucks in change here somewhere. – Evyl

  3. I went to University for five years? Damn, I’m missing out on some serious money and an opportunity to snigger at lazy douches.

    True. – Evyl

  4. I’ve settled more questions brought up at the bar and at family gatherings with my phone……via Google……that’s just dumb….

    Brilliant. – Evyl

  5. Google offers the same SMS texting service for free (standard rates apply). Plus, if you are in a crowd with more than 3 people chances are that one of you has a smart phone with fast internet service. This business is doomed to fail.

    I believe that you are right. – Evyl

  6. I’m going to disagree with B.E. Earl on this one. There’s A LOT of “text-addicts” out there with more dollars than sense.

    PT Barnum did know his stuff. – Evyl

  7. It amazes me what people will pay for…like e-mails from the dead to warn there WoW buddies they are no longer in the guild due to death.

    Now that is wanting to give money away. – Evyl

  8. hold on . . .
    Jam a 10″ spike into my head and I’ll read this post again.
    You’re shitting me, right?
    Good God. we’re doomed.
    ~m

    I believe this was in one of Nostradamus’s quatrains. – Evyl

  9. That’s exactly what I was thinking. It will probably mostly be used by people who cheat at trivia on Thursday nights. I HATE those people.

    They are assholes. – Evyl

  10. Hi Evyl,

    I’m still having a hard time coming to grips with how many people, who have nothing really worth saying, are spending so much money on cell phones so they can say it sooner, and that there are an equal number of people who are stupid enough to pay extra to hear the crap sooner. Texting, on the other hand, makes sense because, let’s face facts, the majority of the population have no skill at writing, so typing a few letters and feeling that they have had meaningful communication with someone, rather than having to take the time to learn how to spell and type, must be a real rush.

    the Grit

    You are absolutely correct. – Evyl

  11. We’re a nation of ijits. What the hell??? Dollars for Dummies or is it Dollars from Dummies?

    Works either way. – Evyl

  12. For a whole $199 a month I have google on my iphone for just such occasions.

    Does that make me an asshole too?

    Only if that surcharge doesn’t let you view porn. – Evyl

  13. Oh FFS…
    That’s just fucked isn’t it?
    πŸ™„

    Yep. – Evyl

  14. lifeunderacarolinamoon Says:

    That really is lazy!! Some people will do anything to avoid doing anything!

    I’ll drink to that. – Evyl

  15. What a great way to have some fun! Would they charge 99 cents if asked
    “how big is my dick?” for 99 cents i hope they say huge. Or for all the ladies “Does my bum look big in this?” you guessed it the 99 cent answer
    “sometimes”

    They’d probably charge extra for flattering answers. – Evyl

  16. Dude, that’s lamer than paying for porn. It’s FREE out there, just LOOK! yeesh…

    Ain’t that the truth. – Evyl

  17. OMG who would really want to give up google for a service like that. I personally would rather use my money for ringtones or other unmentionable things. Google is the best you can find some of the most fucked up sites while just looking for normal answers.

    Nothing like searching for pics on google with the filter off. – Evyl

  18. Wow. That’s the job for me! Are they hiring? πŸ˜‰

    If so you better get on quick. – Evyl

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